I have an english homeowork. i have to add more conversation in this story but i dont have any idea. could you help me to add more conversation in this story please ?

by Fitrianna
(Indonesia)

Original Text: I have an english homeowork. i have to add more conversation in this story but i dont have any idea. could you help me to add more conversation in this story please ?


Snow Maiden

Once upon a time there lived a couple in a village. They had got married for a long time, but so far they did not have a baby yet. Every single minute they prayed to God, begged for a baby, but it never came true.
One day, they went to snow mountain. They made a girl from snow and they dressed her beautifully. When it got dark, they decided to go home and left the snow girl alone.
The following morning, someone knocked the door. "Any body home?” she said. The old woman inside opened the door and asked, "Who are you?" The girl said "I'm Snow Maiden, your daughter". The old woman was surprised and happy, "Oh, really? Thanks God! Come in, please!" Since that meeting, they lived happily.
Snow Maiden was beautiful, kind, diligent and helpful. Her parents and all of her friends loved her very much. One day, Snow Maiden played with her friends. They played fire. At first, Snow Maiden just looked at their play. Suddenly, her friends asked her to jump on the fire. Of course she refused it because one thing that made her afraid was the fire. It's because Snow Maiden was made of snow, so she should avoid the fire. But her friends kept on forcing her to jump on. Finally, she could not do anything then she did it. She jumped on the fire and she melted. Her friends were so sorry about this, they cried and cried hoping Snow Maiden could live again, but it was useless. Snow Maiden would not be back anymore. Her mother tried to entertain Snow Maiden's friends and asked them to make a new Snow Maiden. They went to a snow mountain and started making it. They expected to have the new Snow Maiden. Days passed but their dreams never came true.
Poor them!

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Editor:

Adding dialog (conversation) to the story shouldn't be too hard. Instead of reporting or telling about what a character says, use some words from that character.

For example, in the fourth paragraph you write "Suddenly, her friends asked her to jump on the fire." Try using some words from her friends, like "One friend said, 'Jump on the fire Snow Maiden.' Another said, 'Yes, don't be afraid. Do it! Do it!"

Good luck, and when you are finished, I'll be happy to proofread the story for you.

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Comments for I have an english homeowork. i have to add more conversation in this story but i dont have any idea. could you help me to add more conversation in this story please ?

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thanks! :)
by: fitrianna

thank you very much for your help.
now, i have an idea to add more conversation to that short story.

thanks :)

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