Business Letter

by Haney

Editor:


1. This business letter was received with names and personally identifying information for people involved in a business. I have deleted these mentions following the terms of our Privacy Policy.

2. The edited text of the Business Letter is below the divider.

3. Please review the text carefully to ensure your intended meaning was not mistakenly changed.


Original Text:

Top Confidential ‎


M E M O R A N D U M


DATE:

FROM:

SUBJECT:


By your Excellency’s directives and support, the Internal Audit Division Department’s ‎activities have been remarkably improved and expanded to include new functions and ‎assignments ,which in turn , have given a good deal of extra responsibility upon one of ‎the employees.‎
‎ ‎
‎ XXXX XXXXXXX is one of our outstanding staff members, He has been working within the ‎company for over four years ago, He has been carrying out his duties and day-to-day ‎activities satisfactorily.‎

But, and unfortunately for him, he only receives monthly $ 5200 only as a basic salary.‎

I strongly believe that XX XXXXXXX is underpaid, therefore, I’m asking your Excellency ‎to please agree to add $ 2800 to his basic salary rate to be equal to most of his colleagues, ‎as well as to re-title him to Senio Co-ordinator. I fully recommend him without any ‎reservation for this increase and promotion.‎

This request is hereby submitted to your Excellency’s consideration and approval.‎

Your cooperation and assistance are/is most appreciated .‎

With my highest regards

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Edited Text:

Top Confidential


M E M O R A N D U M


DATE: 30 July 2009

TO:

FROM:

SUBJECT: SALARY ADJUSTMENT.



By your Excellency’s directives and support, the Internal Audit Division Department’s activities have been remarkably improved and expanded to include new functions and assignments, which in turn, has given a good deal of extra responsibility to one of the employees.

XXXX XXXXXXX is one of our outstanding staff members. He has been working in the company for over four years and has been carrying out his duties and day-to-day activities satisfactorily.

Unfortunately, he receives only $5,200 monthly as a basic salary.

I strongly believe that XX. XXXXXXX is underpaid. Therefore, I’m asking your Excellency to please agree to add $2,800 to his basic salary rate to equal that of most of his colleagues, and also to re-title him to Senior Coordinator.

I fully recommend him without any reservation for this increase and promotion.

This request is submitted for your Excellency’s consideration and approval.

Your cooperation and assistance are most appreciated.

With my highest regards,

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