A Place You Go To Relax

by Jen

Original Text: A Place You Go To Relax

My room is that one place I go to relax. It has everything I need when I want to get away from things. Like quiet time for kindergardeners. It has my music, books, and bed with all my stuffed animals on it. So it makes it easier for me when times are tough.
When I go to my room it is usually because I am so tired from my day being so hectic. The first thing I go for is my music. It is a calming thing because all I have to do is put in both headphones and turn up the music so i do not have to listen to anything around me. Just me all by my lonesome self. It does not bother me because I love my alone time. It is needed very much these days.
My books are another main reason to go to my room to relax. I can go in there and pick up any book I want and just read. So my room is my relaxing place. It calms me, puts me in a fantasy world, and keeps me cazy. Takes all my worries away and keeps me care free. I am glad my room is a place that fits me and soothes the mind at the same time. I would not want any other room than mine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Revised Text:

My room is that one place I go to relax. It has everything I need when I want to get away from things, like a quiet time for kinder-gardeners. It has my music, books and my bed with all my stuffed animals on it. It makes it easier for me when times are tough.

When I go to my room, it is usually because I am so tired from my day being so hectic. The first thing I go for is my music. It is a calming thing because all I have to do is put in both headphones and turn up the music, so I do not have to listen to anything around me. Just me, all by my lonesome self. It does not bother me because I love my alone time. It is needed very much these days.

My books are another main reason to go to my room to relax. I can go in there and pick up any book I want and just read. So my room is my relaxing place. It calms me, puts me in a fantasy world, and keeps me cozy. It takes all my worries away and keeps me carefree. I am glad my room is a place that fits me and soothes the mind at the same time. I would not want any room other than mine

Editor:

1. Please review the text carefully to ensure your intended meaning was not mistakenly changed.

2. Before you leave this page, please take a moment to use the "Click here to post comments." link at the bottom of the page to rate the proofreading and leave a comment if you wish.


Proofreading and editing pages that receive ratings and comments are moved to the top of the list.

Click here to post comments

Return to Free English Proofreading and Editing Archive January - March 2011.